Chapter Two: Professor, I Swear I’m Not a Pokémon

"Hmm, a strange ceiling. Don’t tell me I’ve transmigrated again." Chen Ou sighed, both puzzled and helpless. As he tried to sit up and look around, he discovered he couldn’t move at all. His mind finally clearing, he glanced at his hands and realized they were strapped down to the bed. So, the reason he couldn’t move was obvious—he’d been tied up. No, to be precise, he was strapped to a dissection table.

He was all too familiar with this place, though usually he was the one standing with a scalpel, ready to give the white mice or little rabbits a proper send-off. This was his first time lying here, waiting for someone else to give him a funeral. For once, he felt a shred of empathy for the little creatures beneath his knife, touched by their cooperation.

…Who am I kidding! If you’re going to dissect me, at least use anesthesia first! Or just kill me before you start—why the need for a live dissection?

…No, on second thought, being alive is still preferable.

Fortunately, ever since he started transmigrating, Chen Ou could confidently say, "There’s nothing I haven’t seen!" So he remained relatively calm. Remembering he’d eaten the Flare-Flare Fruit last night, he quietly activated his elemental transformation, his wrist slipping easily out of the restraint.

Good, this thing posed no restraint to him.

But to avoid revealing his hand, Chen Ou continued to lie there calmly, not moving a muscle.

"Hey, you’re awake? Get up and have some instant noodles. I’ve made a cup for you too."

A gentle, kindly voice came from beside Chen Ou’s bed. The corner of Chen Ou’s mouth twitched; he knew his attempt at hiding was pointless. He looked up toward the source of the voice and saw an elderly man with graying hair smiling kindly at him.

Professor Oak.

Chen Ou silently called the man’s name in his heart. Instantly, countless scenes from games, anime, and manga involving Professor Oak flashed through his memory. He almost smiled—he’d just found a way to win Professor Oak’s trust and explain his own origins.

He figured he must have transmigrated into Professor Oak’s backyard, and the professor discovered him while tidying up. Thus, he was brought back to the lab. Perfect!

The first operation begins.

"You must be… Professor Oak! My name is Chen Ou, but you can call me Little Ou. I’m a big fan of your senryu poetry. Ah, instant noodles—just what I need, I’m starving! Could you please undo these restraints so I can get down and eat?"

Professor Oak scratched the back of his head in confusion, set two cups of instant noodles on the table, picked up a remote, and turned on the TV.

"Why don’t you come down and eat by yourself?"

Chen Ou was puzzled by Professor Oak’s response and was about to ask something, but as soon as he saw the TV screen, he silently closed his mouth.

On the screen, a boy wreathed in flames was battling fiercely with an Arbok. The boy, shrouded in fire, unleashed a pillar of flame from his fist that sent the Arbok flying.

Damn, I look incredible!

Watching his own heroic figure on the screen, Chen Ou couldn’t help but feel a surge of narcissism.

Then, with perfect righteousness, he declared to Professor Oak, "Professor, please believe me, that handsome guy in the video is absolutely not me. I don’t know where this fire-covered guy came from, but he has nothing to do with me!"

How could he possibly admit that was himself? No matter how conclusive the evidence, as long as he wasn't caught red-handed—no, as long as he wasn’t caught in the act, he’d deny it to the end!

If I don’t admit it, no one can prove it’s me.jpg

Professor Oak picked up a cup of noodles from the table, took a bite, and silently pointed at Chen Ou’s right hand.

Chen Ou took a deep breath. The pungent smell of scorched leather filled his nose. He stiffly turned to look… Ah, still unable to control his new powers perfectly, he’d accidentally set the restraints on fire while basking in his own glory.

He turned back, smiled warmly at Professor Oak, and said, "This—I can explain…"

Professor Oak smiled, picked up the other cup of noodles, and handed it to Chen Ou, who accepted it naturally and thanked him sincerely. Holding the cup in one hand and a fork in the other, he shoveled a big bite into his mouth—he was truly starving. The Devil Fruit not only failed to fill him up, it actually made him nauseous. If he’d known he would transmigrate, he would’ve finished that family-sized bucket of chicken before it was too late.

Then he noticed Professor Oak was watching him with an amused, almost mocking smile. The smile on Chen Ou’s face froze as he glanced at the perfectly intact restraints. He took a deep breath.

Damn, not very thorough…

"So, are you going to admit now that the guy in the video is you?" Professor Oak asked.

Chen Ou widened his eyes pitifully and said, "If I say it’s not, will you promise not to dissect me?"

Of course he was joking. Having read the original story, Chen Ou knew Professor Oak would never do such a thing. And even if this Professor Oak had a dark side, he now had the powers of the Flare-Flare Fruit and wasn’t defenseless.

Professor Oak grinned broadly. "Of course not!"

Chen Ou: "…"

No one ever mentioned that Professor Oak could be such a tease…

I always thought you were the epitome of dignified elders…

Seeing Chen Ou’s look of utter despair, Professor Oak couldn’t help but laugh heartily. In the video, he’d only seen the boy’s miraculous abilities and helplessness; he hadn’t expected him to be this adorable as well. At least his will to survive was strong.

"Don’t worry, I’m not going to dissect you right now. But if you were to die in an accident—well, since your abilities are unprecedented, you’d make a valuable research subject. It would be a shame to waste such precious scientific material."

Understood. I must walk ever further down the path of clinging to life—never to return.

Chen Ou felt grateful for his luck. It was fortunate Professor Oak had found him; if it had been anyone else, he’d probably be done for. If Team Rocket had found him, he’d likely be treated as some unknown rare Pokémon.

"So, Little Ou…" Professor Oak smiled kindly at him. "Can you tell me what species of Pokémon you are? I just drew some of your blood and found you’re no different from a human."

Chen Ou’s smile froze once more.

Couldn’t this world let him enjoy a little warmth for more than a moment? Was everyone here a demon?

With a stiff smile, he replied to this wicked world, "Professor, believe me, I’m human, not a Pokémon."

"Mm, mm, I know. You’re just keeping your identity a secret in the human world. So, are you the offspring of an Infernape and a Ditto? That would explain your flames and your resemblance to humans."

"You’re the offspring of an Infernape and a Ditto! Your whole family is the offspring of an Infernape and a Ditto!"

"That doesn’t make sense either…" Professor Oak pondered for a moment, then suddenly clapped his hands, excitement shining in his eyes. "Then are you perhaps a legendary Pokémon? Let me think—Victini! Your human form is just a psychic disguise. That would explain everything!"

Before Chen Ou could reply, Professor Oak overturned his own theory.

"No, if it were a psychic disguise, your blood shouldn’t be identical to a human’s." His gaze grew more intense as he grabbed Chen Ou by the arm, yanked him off the bed, and shoved him toward the lab equipment.

"Come now, don’t move. Just let me check a little more, it’ll be quick, just a moment!"

Chen Ou felt his vision darkening, as if all hope was slipping away and a tragic future as an experimental subject loomed before him.

Sunlight bathed the roof of Professor Oak’s lab, where a Pidgey dozed. It was suddenly startled awake by the sound of a desperate wail, and flapped off in fright.

"Professor! I’m really not a Pokémon!!!"

"Hahaha, I was just joking! You’re quite an interesting child!"

"Please don’t joke about things like that!!!"