Chapter 144: Military Staffs Won't Do; We Must Use the Door Pillars

The ferocious beasts surrounding Jiang Pingchuan looked with a trace of dread at the divine beast standing behind him. Without being able to channel his true qi, Jiang Pingchuan had no way to activate the golden characters in his mind.

Looking at the divine beast beside him, he had no idea what kind of creature it was. Just as Jiang Pingchuan was pondering while looking at the divine beast that Wang Man had transformed into, the voice of the Pharaoh suddenly echoed in his mind.

"Crimson Qilin."

The Pharaoh's voice flashed through Jiang Pingchuan's mind, but when Jiang Pingchuan tried to use his spiritual sense to communicate with the Pharaoh again, he discovered that the Pharaoh had already vanished.

Jiang Pingchuan gazed at the divine beast beside him; so this creature resembling a Qilin was actually a Crimson Qilin. The Crimson Qilin was not strictly a Qilin, but rather the offspring of a Qilin and a deep-sea flood dragon. Although it was a fire-attributed divine beast, it possessed the abilities of a water-attributed divine beast, capable of walking into the sea, placing it among amphibious divine beasts.

The Crimson Qilin stared at the surrounding fierce beasts with its fiery red eyes, slowly taking steps forward toward the beasts ahead. Although the surrounding fierce beasts were ancient beasts that had been dead for a long time and had long lost their spiritual consciousness, the nature of fierce beasts still retained an instinct for submission when facing a divine beast like the Crimson Qilin. Confronted with the level of coercion radiating so closely from the Crimson Qilin, even without spiritual consciousness, they still retreated step by step. As the fierce beasts retreated, the Crimson Qilin advanced.

After the beasts had backed away a few steps, suddenly one fierce beast acted as if it had gone mad; taking steps forward, it lunged straight at the Crimson Qilin. The Crimson Qilin let out a roar to the heavens and struck the beast's head with a single paw, smashing the monarch-defying beast to pieces.

Following that, the Crimson Qilin charged swiftly toward the remaining beasts. The pack of beasts seemed to suffer a shock that struck straight to their souls; they quickly stepped back and vanished into the thick fog, disappearing from sight.

Seeing the Crimson Qilin's figure also vanish into the thick fog, Jiang Pingchuan suddenly felt a sense of unease and hurriedly gripped the Asura Spear in his hand. Just as Jiang Pingchuan was vigilantly watching the surrounding mist, he saw the fog slowly dissipating. Within a few breaths, the mist completely cleared away, revealing the original terrain.

Seeing the lower path reappear before him, Jiang Pingchuan finally breathed a sigh of relief and hurriedly circulated his true qi. The previously stagnant true qi slowly began to flow once more, with the restorative true qi rapidly healing Jiang Pingchuan's body and swiftly replenishing his drained energy.

Jiang Pingchuan saw a blazing fire erupt around the corner of the path ahead. The flames vanished instantly, and Jiang Pingchuan saw Wang Man staggering forward with a silly smile on his face. Jiang Pingchuan hurriedly swung the Asura Spear in his hand, causing it to vanish.

Jiang Pingchuan walked up to Wang Man and supported the completely exhausted man. Wang Man leaned against Jiang Pingchuan, rolled his eyes, and passed out. After laying Wang Man on the ground and channeling restorative true qi into him, Wang Man opened his hazy eyes and looked at Jiang Pingchuan. At this moment, Wang Man did not have a single piece of clothing on his entire body. Although he was a grown man, it was undeniably quite awkward.

"The feeling of being trusted is wonderful."

Wang Man opened his eyes, looked at Jiang Pingchuan, and said softly. Jiang Pingchuan smiled faintly and glanced at Wang Man's naked body. Wang Man hurriedly gave a couple of dry coughs and covered the vital parts of his body to avoid exposure.

In truth, Jiang Pingchuan desperately wanted to tell Wang Man that he had seen everything when Wang Man underwent his beast transformation, so there was nothing left to cover up. However, considering that Wang Man would feel embarrassed, Jiang Pingchuan deliberately feigned ignorance, acting as though he had seen nothing at all.

"I never expected you to be the successor of the Crimson Qilin."

Jiang Pingchuan said, looking at the brand on Wang Man's face that had not yet completely faded. Wang Man nodded, clenched his fist, and showed Jiang Pingchuan his shoulder. On Wang Man's right shoulder was a faint character meaning "Crimson," which presumably was the mark of the Crimson Qilin's successor.

"Clatter, clatter, clatter..."

"Giddyup, giddyup..."

"It's all your fault, you idiot! I told you to hurry up, but you insisted on dragging your feet, and as a result, we got trapped by this damn fog..."

"Screw your ancestors! Look, didn't I tell you just like I said? I said the fog would clear on its own, and look, didn't it clear up..."

"This formation was broken by someone else, it has nothing to do with you, so stop daydreaming..."

"Hey, hey, when did the two of you form a united front? Lord Mao, say something..."

"You three complete morons..."

Jiang Pingchuan and Wang Man exchanged glances. Hearing the voices, it sounded like Long Heng and the others had arrived. Jiang Pingchuan helped Wang Man to sit by the roadside while he stood in the middle of the road, awaiting the noisy arrival of the three men and one cat.

Before long, the figures of Long Heng, Xia Ha, Duo Lun, and Mao Qiu appeared before Jiang Pingchuan. Mao Qiu was lying on a horse's head, sleeping with all four paws up in the air, while Duo Lun, Long Heng, and Xia Ha nagged at each other all the way.

When Long Heng raised his head, he suddenly saw Jiang Pingchuan standing smilingly in the middle of the road ahead. Startled, he stumbled and nearly fell off his horse. Immediately afterward, Duo Lun and Xia Ha also spotted Jiang Pingchuan; they hurriedly reined in their warhorses, dismounted, and walked quickly toward Jiang Pingchuan.

"General Pingchuan, your subordinates have arrived late, please forgive us, General."

Duo Lun walked up to Jiang Pingchuan and dropped directly to one knee. Long Heng and Xia Ha exchanged glances and obediently dropped to one knee as well. Just as Long Heng knelt and raised his head, he happened to catch sight of a naked Wang Man lying by a stone at the roadside.

"What the hell, what kind of situation is this in broad daylight?"

After blurting this out, Long Heng suddenly woke up and looked at Jiang Pingchuan with extreme awkwardness. Wang Man flushed red with embarrassment and hurriedly grabbed a few foxtail grasses from the roadside to cover his private parts, looking utterly ridiculous.

Xia Ha and Duo Lun also noticed the naked Wang Man by the roadside, but unlike Long Heng, they didn't shout at the top of their lungs; they merely cast strange looks at Jiang Pingchuan. Noticing the expressions of the three men, Jiang Pingchuan gave a couple of dry coughs and told them to stand up.

"Long Heng, go fetch a set of clothes and dress him."

Jiang Pingchuan said, looking at Long Heng. With his eyes fixed intently on Wang Man's private parts in a daze, Long Heng muttered an absent-minded "oh," turned around, and walked toward the main army, which had already halted.

After walking a few steps, Long Heng instinctively touched his own crotch and let out a mournful wail. He wanted to ask how that guy managed to grow so large; it didn't look like dimensions belonging to a human being at all, which filled Long Heng with genuine envy. Long Heng walked with a serious expression to the front of the main army and looked at the soldiers in the first row.

"You, take off your jacket. You, take off your shoes. You, take off your pants. And you, go aside and take off your underwear for me."

Long Heng pointed at the cavalrymen in the front row. After waiting a moment until the last soldier took off his underwear and handed it to him, Long Heng clutched the full set of clothes and walked back toward Jiang Pingchuan.

Wang Man instantly regretted accepting the clothes from Long Heng's hands. He had to put on the clothes under the intense gaze of Long Heng's bell-like eyes. Throughout the process, Long Heng stood beside Wang Man, endlessly praising his great physique and well-endowed frame, while also asking for the secret to growing so large. Wang Man simply looked at Long Heng with an innocent and pure gaze, not saying a single word.

"Did you encounter any ambush forces of the Man King along the way?"

Jiang Pingchuan asked, looking at Duo Lun. Seeing that the three men in front of him still had the leisure to bicker and joke with each other, Jiang Pingchuan felt that it was truly as Wang Man had said: taking the lower road was a taboo for military expeditions in the Northwest.

"Reporting to the General, the journey was extremely smooth. Apart from encountering thick fog ahead that prevented us from advancing, we did not encounter any ambush forces whatsoever."

Duo Lun said earnestly, looking at Jiang Pingchuan. Hearing this, Jiang Pingchuan nodded. It seemed it really was as Wang Man had said—the military forces of the Northwest actually held such absurd taboos. Jiang Pingchuan picked up a stone from the ground and threw it toward Mao Qiu, who was sleeping soundly with all four paws in the air on the horse's head.

As the stone approached Mao Qiu, one of the cat's paws lifted to intercept it. The stone spun continuously on the tip of its claw until it slowly turned into dust and scattered onto the ground. Jiang Pingchuan looked at Mao Qiu with a smile, while Wang Man, standing behind Jiang Pingchuan, furrowed his brow as he stared at the creature.

When Mao Qiu sat its feline body upright, the very first thing it saw was Wang Man standing behind Jiang Pingchuan. Mao Qiu bared its beastly fangs, leaped onto Jiang Pingchuan's shoulder, glanced at Wang Man standing behind him, and let out a yawn.

"That's a wild beast, watch out, don't let it bite you."

Mao Qiu muttered a low remark within Jiang Pingchuan's spiritual sense, yawned, squinted its eyes, and pressed against Jiang Pingchuan's shoulder to fall fast asleep once more. Jiang Pingchuan looked at Wang Man behind him.

Wang Man's gaze seemed filled with curiosity toward Mao Qiu, though Jiang Pingchuan had no way of knowing whether Mao Qiu could sense Wang Man's true form, or if Wang Man could sense Mao Qiu's true form.

Back when Mao Qiu had once manifested the shadow of a tiger, Jiang Pingchuan had tried using the golden characters in his mind to figure out the origin of that tiger shadow, but yielded not a shred of information. In Jiang Pingchuan's heart, aside from the Three Realms Envoy being an enigma, Mao Qiu was also an enigma.

"Lead the troops and follow me to the border patrol camp."

Jiang Pingchuan said to Duo Lun. Duo Lun nodded, turned around, and passed down Jiang Pingchuan's military orders. Jiang Pingchuan mounted his warhorse and, riding shoulder to shoulder with Wang Man, headed toward the patrol camp.

Through the events that had just transpired within the miasma formation, a subtle shift occurred in the relationship between Jiang Pingchuan and Wang Man. Jiang Pingchuan felt that although there were still many things about Wang Man he did not know, Wang Man seemingly harbored no malice toward him. At times, Jiang Pingchuan even felt that Wang Man's appearance, beyond mere coincidence, felt more like a destined fate.

When Jiang Pingchuan led Long Heng, Xia Ha, Duo Lun, the four hundred thousand troops, and the provisions to the patrol camp, the sky had already grown completely dark. After settling the six hundred thousand troops, Jiang Pingchuan had Tie Shilin escorted directly into his own tent.

Watching Tie Shilin sitting on the ground with the attitude of a dead pig unafraid of boiling water, everyone present grew intrigued. Upon learning of Tie Shilin's actions, Long Heng and Xia Ha repeatedly denounced him as an idiot. Along the way, Wang Man had hit it off famously with Long Heng and Xia Ha, especially Long Heng, who persistently sought to learn Wang Man's secret to growing so large in order to strengthen his own physique.

"Tie Shilin, you disregarded the law and discipline, neglected your duty, and violated military regulations. You are hereby sentenced according to military law to one hundred strokes of the heavy staff and reassigned to frontline combat. Guards, carry out the sentence!"

Jiang Pingchuan sat behind his desk, gazing with a firm and resolute expression at Tie Shilin on the ground. Upon hearing Jiang Pingchuan's order, Tie Shilin sneered; this was his own patrol camp, after all. However, when he saw the soldiers stepping forward to carry out the punishment, Tie Shilin was dumbfounded. These were all soldiers brought by Jiang Pingchuan; what did they care who he was? The soldiers strode up to Tie Shilin and directly pinned him face down onto the ground, while two other soldiers walked forward holding thick wooden staves, preparing to treat Tie Shilin's backside properly.

"Wait a moment..."

"General, I, Long Heng, utterly detest such lawless scoundrels. How about letting me carry out the punishment?"

Long Heng said, smiling broadly as he looked at Jiang Pingchuan. Jiang Pingchuan glanced at Long Heng and nodded. With a hearty laugh, Long Heng directly took a heavy staff from one of the soldiers and took aim at Tie Shilin's backside.

Seeing that Long Heng was going to administer the punishment, Xia Ha could not stay idle either. Without another word, he snatched the heavy staff from another soldier's hand and similarly took aim at Tie Shilin's backside. Tie Shilin looked at the two men smiling sinisterly, and suddenly his sphincter clenched tightly as a chilling sensation ran down his lower body.

"Little bastard, take this stick..."

"Crack... bang..."

Suddenly, the moment Long Heng swung the staff down and made contact with Tie Shilin's backside, the heavy staff snapped cleanly into two halves. Looking at the half-staff remaining in his hand, Long Heng trembled with annoyance, threw the broken staff aside, and cast a glance at Jiang Pingchuan while rolling his eyes rapidly, his mind once again scheming.

"General, the space inside this tent is too small to swing properly, and these staves aren't sturdy enough. Everyone, please wait a moment."

Without waiting for Jiang Pingchuan to reply, Long Heng simply hauled the half-dead Tie Shilin up, dragged him out of the tent, and tossed him onto the ground outside.

Long Heng then strode swiftly to the entrance of the patrol camp, spat twice into his palms, rubbed them together, and directly yanked out one of the doorposts—which was as thick as a man's thigh—hoisted it onto his shoulder, and walked back toward Tie Shilin with a grin. Catching a glimpse of the thigh-thick wooden pillar on Long Heng's shoulder, Tie Shilin rolled his eyes back and fainted dead away from sheer terror.

Disciplining Tie Shilin with a regular military staff simply wouldn't do; for that job, a doorpost was required.