Chapter Thirty-Nine: Is Jiang Mochen Impotent?

When Su Chen returned, Su Wan greeted him with a smile and waved. With a heavy heart, Su Chen walked over. Su Wan pressed a few tangerines into his hand. “Eat up, I saved these just for you.”

“Big sister,” he said hesitantly, “come here, I have something to tell you.”

Everyone laughed. “Oh, little Chen wants to share secrets with his big sister!”

“It’s always like this when you’re young, he just can’t bear to part with his sister.”

In the past, Su Chen would have blushed scarlet and retorted loudly, but now he paid them no mind, hurrying to pull Su Wan away.

Once they were outside the main gate, Su Chen finally let go of her hand. “I have something to tell you.”

Noticing his troubled expression, Su Wan didn’t tease him. “Go ahead.”

“I think Jiang Mochen is ill.”

At his words, Su Wan immediately tensed up. Seeing how difficult this was for Su Chen to say, could it be that Jiang Mochen had… issues with that? But that couldn’t be! He was tall and strong, not someone who looked incapable!

Su Chen stammered, wanting to bring up the matter of the fox, but Su Wan, embarrassed, quickly waved her hand to interrupt him. “Enough, I’ll ask him myself.”

Su Chen, still worried, tried to follow, but Su Wan stopped him. “What are you doing?”

“I’m afraid he’ll hurt you,” Su Chen said anxiously.

Su Wan thought for a moment. Men tended to be sensitive about such things, but as long as she didn’t anger him, there shouldn’t be a problem.

“I’ll run if I must.” Her gaze was resolute—no matter what, Su Chen couldn’t be involved in this conversation.

Su Chen considered the situation. Things had come this far; Su Wan couldn’t break off the engagement lightly again. Maybe if the two of them talked frankly, they’d find it was all just a misunderstanding. So he didn’t insist.

Dusk gradually fell, the sky darkening outside.

The door of Jiang Mochen’s house was half-closed. Inside, darkness reigned; not a single lamp was lit. Su Wan found it odd—was Jiang Mochen not home?

She hesitated, but still pushed the door open and called his name.

No one responded.

Yet Su Wan felt certain someone was there. She walked inside slowly. “Jiang Mochen, are you there?”

The courtyard was pitch black. As she approached the house, she suddenly saw a dark shape by the door.

Entering, she realized it was Jiang Mochen.

He was clutching something tightly in his arms, trembling uncontrollably.

Su Wan moved closer and heard him muttering, “Don’t kill me, don’t kill me…”

Startled, she grabbed his arm, “What’s wrong? Who wants to kill you?”

But Jiang Mochen only trembled harder, as if something had deeply frightened him.

Su Wan let go and hurried into the house to switch on the lamp.

Warm yellow light instantly flooded the room, brightening even the space outside.

When Su Wan returned to Jiang Mochen, he had stopped trembling, though he still clung to whatever was in his arms, silent.

“Shall we go inside?” she asked gently.

He said nothing, so Su Wan reached out to pull him up.

“Are you here to break off the engagement?” Jiang Mochen suddenly asked in a low voice.

Su Wan paused, but still took his hand and pulled him to his feet.

He followed her docilely into the house.

In the glow of the lamp, Su Wan finally saw what he was holding—a fiery red fox.

The little fox hung its head, tail and ears drooping, its paws wrapped thickly in gauze.

“Where did you get this little fox?” Su Wan asked in surprise, reaching out to stroke it.

The fox didn’t struggle, only drooped its head and let her touch it.

After playing with it for a while, Su Wan glanced up and saw Jiang Mochen regarding her with an inscrutable look.

“What is it?” she asked curiously.

Jiang Mochen shook his head. “Why did you come?”

Su Wan took a few tangerines from her pocket and handed them to him. “I saved these just for you.”

He didn’t reach out to take them, remaining silent.

Su Wan sat him down on the edge of the bed.

This was awkward—how was she supposed to ask without embarrassment? She couldn’t say Su Chen had told her, or the two would quarrel. Nor could she ask directly, for fear of wounding his pride.

While Su Wan was tangled in her thoughts, Jiang Mochen suddenly spoke. “You saw it just now. I really am ill.”

She was still thinking about that particular problem, and was briefly confused by his words.

Just now?

But just now he…

Suddenly, Su Wan realized perhaps Su Chen hadn’t been talking about that at all.

“What illness?”

Jiang Mochen lowered his head, gently stroking the fox. “Epilepsy.”

“I developed it after my adoptive father died.”

“At dusk, as night falls, I have seizures.”

Jiang Mochen didn’t dare tell her he was haunted by his adoptive father’s ghost, afraid of frightening her away.

Hearing this, Su Wan immediately understood—this was a psychological illness, much like depression. With help from a good therapist, perhaps he could recover.

She’d heard some things about Jiang Mochen too. He’d often been abused by his adoptive father as a child. There was no doubt the illness was connected to that man.

“It’s all right, this can be treated,” Su Wan said, taking his hand. “Look, you’re fine tonight, aren’t you?”

Jiang Mochen lifted his head, eyes suddenly bright with hope. “You mean it can be cured?”

Su Wan nodded firmly. “Of course.”

“Then… can you not break off the engagement? I’ll do my best to get better.” His eyes were dewy, so innocent and pitiful.

Su Wan was stunned. She’d always thought Jiang Mochen didn’t want this betrothal, and that his kindness to her was only out of duty. But now, he was begging her not to break it off.

Could it be he actually cared for her?

Secretly delighted, Su Wan kept her composure, hesitated shyly for a moment, then said, “All right.”

Jiang Mochen’s face lit up. He gripped her hand tightly. “That’s wonderful!”

Now that Su Wan understood, there was no reason to linger. She bid him farewell. “It’s getting late, I should go home. You should get some rest too.”

She wouldn’t dare linger when so many relatives awaited her at home. If she stayed out after dark, who knew what people would say? Gossip traveled fast—she’d never clear her name no matter what she did.

“I’ll walk you out,” Jiang Mochen offered, starting to rise.

Su Wan quickly pressed him back down. “No, it’s only a short way. I’ll be home in no time. Get some rest.”

Even though they were engaged, this was still a conservative era—she had to respect custom.

Finishing, Su Wan hurried off.

She didn’t see, as she turned away, a shadow flicker across Jiang Mochen’s face.

That was close. He hadn’t expected Su Wan to come so soon and to witness his fit.

Recalling what had just happened, Jiang Mochen’s expression grew solemn.

Strange… When the lamp came on, his adoptive father’s specter had vanished. That had never happened before. It seemed, ever since Su Wan’s arrival, his seizures had become lighter and lighter.